odds and sods bits and bobs.

From Sunsets

This Friday saw all the schools in the Shiga area compete in a huge variety of sports contests. I've always been a little amazed Japan doesn't excell in more sports as rain or shine, weekday night or weekend you can usually find my students practicing some sport or another. Actually thinking about it its probably something to do with either; Japan playing sports that no one else plays (see Handball for that one, another sport incorporated from America who I blame completely for me having to call football "soccer") or giving themselves a disadvantage (see softball tennis for that one if students played with an actual tennis ball then I'm pretty sure the outcome in Wimbledon would be very different).
Anyway in the afternoon I went off to see the Kendo tournament in one of the local towns whose name, like most of those of my students escapes me. There's nothing quite like walking into a room and seeing 200 kids hitting each other on the head with a big stick while screaming and frankly that's one of the reason why I like watching kendo, another is that apparently size and age doesn't actually matter that much so you'll see tiny tiny students tackle even the tallest (well tall now thanks to all that beef and milk hmmm hormones) student.
Here's a photo from the event taken on my trusty but slightly blurry camera phone. I did find my students developed the "KENDO STARE" which is when a normal happy babbling student dons a kendo mask and promptly looses all abilities to think apart from "HIT HIT HIT HIT YELL HIT YELL HIT"



Here's some you tube footage of championship kendo, the aim is to hit the oppositions head or arm while shouting a certain word (Which I don't think is sorry) and you need 2 or more judges to award you a point to actually score, 2 points and your declared the winner.


Of course being in Japan you know that sooner or later a robot will appear, although I think this ones got a few years of development yet


Oh and I've updated my sunset gallery, the other day I rode over to our local lake and watched the sun slowly fall int eh sky. Click the pictures below to go to the album

From Sunsets

From Sunsets

OW OW ow ow ohh ow ow ow ow ow ow ow ow

Usually my postings fly out like the beginning of Murder she wrote (although minus the murder of course (actually how does she manage to be in exactly the right place at the right time? (actually after years of studenthood (did I just invent that word) I've noticed you can always spot the murder, they're always the person who's rudest to Jessica "Crime spree" Fletcher)))
However, today I'm smashing at the keyboard like a monkey attempting to write Dickens. And why? (I probably don't hear you asking..) because it turns out that the weekend hike along waterfalls was actually a hike THROUGH waterfalls!

Me and T.O.H generally don't travel to Takashima much, not just because we're Southside they're Westside and obviously we don't want to start a rumble. But because its A) So damn far and B) I'm so damn lazy. Still after a train journey just past Takashima (home of a giant Gulliver statue learning over the town, which possibly explains why so many Japanese people think foreigners are so tall hmm) we headed over to Gulliver's World, situated somewhere in the mountains next toYatsubuchi no Taki a series of increasingly big waterfalls. I not quite sure why a small town in Japan would associate itself with a fictional traveller famous for meeting little people and then big people, but this is Japan the place where you can find Amusement parks called Germany world and Spain land, so I've learnt not to question things too much.
For the young people, sadly the old people are locked out at night to fend for themselves.

From what I've seen, Japanese camping usually takes the form of massive tents clustered around each other just outside of the car park areas, and the only camp fire they see is the glow of the BBQ. So heaven knows what they thought about us heading into the woods to attempt to fend for ourselves, well the massive supply of soy joy bars and caloriemate probably would help.
The first falls we saw were all man made, either that or Nature has finally perfected the straight line.

Once we dumped of our stuff, I thought we were taking a nice swim before changing for the hike. So there I was in just my swimming shorts (no shoes) when I realised that this was the actual hike. Still when faced with these sort of situations 2 years in Japan has kind of given me a "ahhh to hell with it" attitude usually this means eating something that's staring at me, not cooked or left to rot for a few days, but it can also be applied to waterfall hikes I suppose.
Our local stream.

Sadly because of the surprise nature of the hike and me not wanting to walk anywhere on my burning feet, there' s a distinct lack of photo's. however like the student searching for something to write his dissertation on (and will be disqualified for plagiarism) I have found a few items floating around the mystical ether we call THE INTERNET. So Here's a blog detailing one such trek along the trails, although considering that I did it all in bare feet I have a small sense of smugness, that and twisted toes. Some of the pictures below come from the blog to give you an idea of what we were climbing. Note the chain on the right, where I learnt even after all these years away from school I still can't climb ropes.

We clambered over algae smeared rocks, hauled ourselves up tree roots and scrabbled (I do a good scramble) up rusted metal chains and ladders. All in my bare feet, which after a while began to burn when not in the freezing cold waters (oh blessed freezing waters) Still we managed to make good progress. In fact the only real problem came at the top of the waterfalls where I looked down and realised that my toes on my right foot had locked into some sort of weird claws and were unable to move.
Here's where I realised that toes shouldn't be pointing in opposite directions.
(again Image taken from http://www.brandongermer.com/Yatsubuchi-no-taki.htm )

Traveling down the falls was somewhat easier as I tried the ancient method of "sliding on my arse" with gravity on our side and a real need to go toilet (hey I'm not going in the bushes after almost treading on a snake earlier in the day.I have some dignity you know.) we managed to make some good time.
I think at one point we scared the begollies out of a group of Japanese people who were kitted out in hard hats, wet suits, life jackets, oh and climbing shoes all linked together by a massive rope. They turned a corner to find me and my friend crouched on a rock staring at them like some sort of lost tribe of Japan, while having to stop and let them all pass one women asked me if we wore shoes, although I'm not sure she meant in the falls or in my country.
Saturday night was, unlike Elton John who prefers a fight, collecting firewood and then reenacting the ancient art of fire staring hmmmmmmmmmm flames. Before heading over to our tent to appreciate the usefulness of a fly gun.

The next day I've found aches on places I actually didn't know I had, scrapes all over my legs and an inability to move my arms up, but I can say I've done it and I've got the twisted toes to prove it.

For information about getting to the falls see here
Or Here
.... Oh and even better a video of the entire thing, just click on the user for the rest of the videos to see.

Headmaster clothing watch; Tight white polo shirt, elasticated black trousers, white socks.
Headmaster style watch; Like a bond villain who can't afford a hollowed out Volcano and so settles for a secret underground dance class room.

All aboard...the beer train

Whilst reading this posting, or mearly marveling at my incredibly bad use of English, please have the following song playing or at least running through your head, it would also help if you could have random Japanese people stare at you through the window and someone gently prodding you left and right.
James Brown - Night train

(Note this song is to listen too, or, I suppose, for sampling reasons only, not to copy!! If you are the owner of this song and want it removed please let me know, although If I receive a phone call from James Brown I will be kind of amazed for a whoooollle number of reasons.)

Anyway, yes my friends Tuesday night not only saw payday (WOO HOO time to buy that hat!) but also my first and probably only trip on...(well actually the suspense is kind of redundant just by looking at the posts title) THE BEER TRAIN!

You see because me and T.O.H are embedded quite deep into Japanese country side (nearest convience store is a whole 7 minutes down the road!!!!) the only way we can get around is either the bus or the local train, both of which are extremely old, slow and offer a home for most of Japans insect population. But once a year the bunting gets unrolled, tables are set up and the old people of Yochaichi start limbering up, as for 2,900 yen (about 13 pounds, for those who want to know) you get a bento (lunch box, thankfully not this one) set, a bowl of peas and unlimited beer.

BEHOLD THE MIGHTY POWER OF THE BEER TRAIN, true it is our normal train with a sticker on the front but still, BEHOLD ITS AWESOMENESS!

Getting to the station we found lots of eager Japanese people most of whom seemed "older" men although it was heartwarming to see people bring their children along...oh no I mean worrying it was worrying.

On the left is the mighty bento box, on the mighty beer train in the errr mighty Yochaichi (mighty since 2005 FACT!)
Which contained the usual fried chicken things, fish things and various vegetables things. And yes after 2 years in Japan I suppose I should know what everything is, but hey the first step is eating everything, the NEXT is knowing what it is...
I think.....

on the right is our friendly waiter who when not making random
announcements "beer is good, drink beer, beer is life" ect ect was busy responding to our increasingly slurred shouts of sumimuuuuseeeeeeeeeeennnn (excuse me).
After 2 years of being ignored in restaurants due to an inibitily to shout at exactly the right pitch and volume, I think I've now found the correct way to which to bellow said Japanese word although not quite like this.

For some amazingly strange reason all the foreigners (us) were placed at the very front of the train, where we would occasionally have curious people wander on over to stare at us eating. YES we CAN use chopsticks, and YES we can eat fish.

I believe this man was on some sort of bet, "go on I DARE you to speak to those non Japanese people, I'll give you this fish"

After my holiday in England I was a little worried I wouldn't be able to settle back into the swing of things. Thankfully my gifts from England proved to be somewhat popular, my friend foolishly asked me for either Ray Winstons whisker (Of course everyone knows there's only famous people living in London) or a Sherlock Holmes hat. Well Thankfully/sadly I delivered one of these things, frankly whats better (and more appreciated) than to, after an hour of drinking, pull out the masks and presents.

"Elementary dear Watson. If you drink three cups of beer, what ever drink remains, what ever it is, shall be even tastier"

Sadly I forgot his smoking pipe so he had to do with a beer instead.

Halfway through we stopped off for a toilet break, where we found more than a few people on the train already quite wasted, in fact the staff had to wait outside the toilets so that no one would be left behind, although the speed the train went I'm pretty sure I could have ran and caught it up.

Here we can see a very blurry shot
(sorry camera phone + train + lots of beer = random slurring and shaky pictures) of a lady in a Kimono, nothing says traditional like an all you can drink beer train.

And of course nothing Say's BEER TRAIN better than bringing your children along Presumably so that they can learn at an early age the dangers of drinking or alternatively just so they can help you get home. at the end of the journey we (our group and I) descended down the carriages to shake hands with all the other passengers and gcongratulate them for not passing out . Although more than a few times I had this conversation....

Japanese old man to my friend: "Where are you from?"

My friend: "America!"

Old Japanese man: "hurrarrr America HURRARRRR!!!" to me "where are you from?

Me: "England!"

Old Japanese man: "........."

Oh well next year I'm saying Canada to see what happens.

Oh and if this wasn't enough the beer train (sorry I should say BEER TRAIN) also came with a 500 yen off voucher for the local Karaoke...Sadly the rest of the evening is kind of a big blurry mess with vague memory's of singing a German song (Despite not being able to actually speak German of course) taking some random far too drunk photographs with T.O.H, at some point feeling somewhat "ill" while finding the floor very comfortable and a thankfully very nice taxi driver. The next thing I wake up to find my clothes in various piles around the house, a (thankfully empty) bucket next to me and a wallet empty of cash so I presume I had a good time. Anyway I don't recomend going on your local bus and attempting the same experience but next year if your in Yochaichi then I highly recomend it.

Headmaster watch; khaki shirt, black tie, light blue tie pin.
Headmaster style; Dictator sent from the future to erase the past!.

WOOOOOOOOH!

I may not want to believe in fate, but that doesn't mean I don't love it when coincidences happen. Just before leaving Japan me and a friend sent the exact same picture to each other within minutes of each other. My friend has already put it on their journel her,But I thought I'd also share my photo (you lucky people you).
I've already mentioned that Kiefer sutherland isn't affraid to do a spot of advertisment, or send up his own image, or more usually send up his own image in a spot of advertisment. But I'm not sure if he would fully appreciate being shown making a noise like a dog being shot into space.

Hey Kiefer can you do your best Bill and Ted impression?

Oh sorry Kiefer was this your last Cadbury's cream egg?

Hey keifer I've just written another post!

no wait....thats not right.

odd and ends part 2 - and what odds they are

Right its now Saturday morning I've set the bed up in the lounge (hurrarr lazyness rules!) Sharpes on TV, the Flaming lips are on Last.fm and I've got bacon and eggs to cook, the only downside is the wooziness from last night... now what was i doing?? ohh yes this.

Last night was my Friends (see glasses wearer on the right) B day so we headed to Kyoto for a 4 hour all you can drink and eat session, along the way we sang some Beatles, ate some food (yes kids its true I can use chopsticks) someone invented a new drink which involved large amounts of alchohol syrup (and probably explains the delicate head I have on this morning) oh and I gave my friend his b day present beer glasses, Krang from the mutant ninja turtles (interesting fact I never thought of before, in ENgland we had to call them teenage mutant hero turtles because obviosuly the very use of the word Ninja is too baddass) warped faced Michael Jackson keychain (you'd really have to see it to find it funny) and fake facial hair, sadly only one of these was employed during the evening but theres many more nights to come so you never know.
Anyway here are some more photo's from the last few days.

First up Tennoji high street full of taxis.









Below is one of the many resturants dotted around Shin Osaka station, where you can spot the rare breed of person known as Salary men a strange breed who are seen at night staggering around looking for home, or standing around eating noodles. These boards (also at the station) seemed to have been written by a schizophrenic coffee addicted philosopher. But more important WHATS THE ANSWER!! WHATS THE ANSWER!!!!!!

















The train of the future, well if the future was 1970
oh and heres the bear garden from last night ohhh pretty lights





Here's the local train station, through which through simple lighting, some clever gardening, and decoration have made the spookiest place ever. Just the welcoming scene you want before you set off walking through pitch black rice fields at night

Kites kites kites, did I mention the kites? My weekend part 2

So after the prison food and mushroom madness Sunday was more of a casual affair, it was on with the hat, shades and suncream and off to Yokaichi to watch the kite festival. Without doubt the Yokaichi kite festival is on the biggest things to hit our small area with bus, train and bikes full of people arriving to watch the displays, eat from the many many ohh so many hot dog stands and be prepared to run when one of the large kites goes rouge. (Oh and for some reason the computer keeps moving the pictures around, I daren't move anyhing in case they are deleated please bare with me and sorry!)

This is one of the large kites entered into the competition, the rules of which I actually don't know, but I'm guessing it involved flying the kite and attempting not to decapatate anyone (most kites achieved one of these things.. but I'm not saying which one)



Lots of people young and old arrived with their own kites, the sky was full of paintings, insects, birds and errr cows.

This is one of the many chain kites that littered the landscape.


This mans kites (on the right) had the same pattern as his Jimben


Click here for the full album from Picassa

This is the grand display, featuring what I think was possibly the biggest Kite in allllll of Japan around 200 tatami mates big, if that doesn't mean anything to you (and frankly if you don't live in Japan it probably mean nothing) our living room is six tatami mates if thats any indication of size.




This is the crash site of the giant kite, stuck in a the nearby bamboo forest. Oh and thats not the giant kite on the right, the actual giant kite was about 3 times as big.



This man is beginning to realise that when the shadow on the ground gets bigger and bigger you should really begin to run.

And finally click on the fish kite below to go the album. Whilst the video below is the awesome display that no one seemed to be watching except for us, you can hear how loud the wind is throughout.

Idols, Lock ups and kites. My weekend Part 1 Kyoto

This looong weekend has seen me and T.O.H watch a lot of American Idol (media blackout still on as its the grand final viewing tonight HURRARR, well not that hurrar as its Jordin and blake more hey!) we headed to Kyoto, ate food in a cell and watched as giant kites crash to earth... so the usual weekend then...

Obviously you don't really need any pictures of us watching American idol, just the mental picture should be enough but if not here's a picture of us taken when Melinda was knocked out be warned its not for the faint hearted.

So Saturday we headed over to Kyoto to meet a few friends and head off to eat at The Lockup....

Japan may be land of the rising sun, rice fields and noisy frogs but its also the home of novelty restaurants. Whether its having to rub a magic lamp to get in, ninjas serving your food or just people shouting in a high pitched Winny voice, Japan my friends has it all.

The Lockup's main attraction is that you eat in a prison, yep cells and all, its not exactly Oz but more like a prison designed by a short attention spanned teenage manga fan.

So after the dark passage way with a few surprises and after you you put your hand in the guillotine to get in the door, your led to your own cell handcuffed to the guard

(this being Japan the guard is a scantily clad young lady) settling down behind your bars you order your food and drinks from the striped jump suited waiter (when I say order I mean point at the menu and shout) and then enjoy the surroundings, all whilst often getting stared at from the barred windows of your cubicle by the drunk office party workers

At some point in the proceedings there's a show... annnd well I don't want to spoil anything if you ever go. Lets just say that something special happens for the dinners. It's nothing too bad just lots of noise and excitement.

Oh and if you do ever go tell them its your first time, and its your birthday too guaranteeing a strangled rendition of happy birthday, your own cake and a guerrilla playing the tambourine,

yeah just like your actual birthday....

After the fun and games its back out onto the busy streets of Kyoto and onto the Mushroom bar, I know I've talked about this before, but this time I took my proper camera with me for some shots of the only bar where if you do see pink elephants then the chances are they're actually real.

Oh and here's the awesomely haired (is that even proper English? I've been in Japan too long to actually know) bar owner complete with mushroom/bowl haircut, who rides to and from work on his very own in line skates something that I have to see before I die.

I've put more pictures on my Picasa album which you can get to by clicking here...

next up part 2 the kite festival..ohhhhhhhh